Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
My ass is underappreciated
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
