I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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