After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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