the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
We're not piercing ourselves today.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
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