did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
He had one of those small greek statue penises
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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