butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
