I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
