Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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