real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
