Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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