first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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