you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
