Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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