phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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