I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
