found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
