We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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