On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
