I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
