3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
