I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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