We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
