mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
time to smoke my breakfast
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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