I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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