Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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