please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Randomize
