We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
