Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Randomize
