NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
