believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
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