Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
