who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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