i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
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And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
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Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Alive.
So much puke
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
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