Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
