Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
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