it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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