I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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