her vagine was all disorganized.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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