Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
