I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
