I bet he comes in French.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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