so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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