For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize