Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
