ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
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