it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
nutella sex= disaster
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
