i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
