Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
