Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
