Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
did i just pee glitter
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