He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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