ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
